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Clever Pseudonym's avatar

I'd like to add some detail here to Lorenzo's excellent landscape painting, from my little corner of the world.

My wife is a novelist who knows and mentors many young women writers, so my home is usually swamped with books and galleys and manuscripts, if not the actual authors themselves.

Now of course I don't know the full life stories of all these young women, but for the most part they are attractive, reasonably well-off and well-educated, with decent jobs from supportive families etc, and are living here in California in perhaps the time of the greatest sexual equality in history, with tremendous freedom and opportunity, and yet—just about their entire corpus is a litany of misery and complaint, usually in a few basic flavors: screeds against the patriarchy and/or overheated Handmaiden fantasies about evil men; complaints about exes and their sins, which could probably go in a bookstore aisle labeled BAD BOYFRIENDS; then personal odysseys usually about multiple sex partners and/or multiple nervous breakdowns and/or multiple shrinks and their medications, all of it told in the same mode of Look at Me, I'm a Stunning & Brave Victim of malevolent maleness and the evil world men have created.

My feeling is that young women in our age of total liberation can't quite handle all the freedom they've been given, and now that Victim ideology/morality is the only game in town, many of them (ironically often the most privileged) have developed a weird autoimmune disease where they need to have constant public tantrums to show how anxious and miserable they are, which allows them to pose as righteous victims and bask in whatever attention this provides—while also relieving them of the burdens of autonomy and responsibility. (Or maybe Anne Sexton said it better: "My need is more desperate!")

Is it possible maybe that the dreaded patriarchy was even more beneficial to women than it was to men??

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Benjamin Cole's avatar

Interesting post.

It would be nice just once to hear a woman say, "Some guy, covered on grease, fixed my car, while working in an auto repair barn without air-conditioning. I don't even know what was wrong with the car, which, btw, is air-conditioned. I turn on a tap, and water comes out. I flush the toilet, and it goes away. Flick a switch, the lights come on. All this is built and maintained by men, because we women, by and large, do not want to do it. None---and I mean none---of my female friends or associates aspire to be garage mechanics."

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